Pushing through

When back packing I consider a drought to be more than three days without any (unpaid for) sexual encounters. The facts are that you’re going to be meeting a lot of horny young locals and if that fails you can always try your luck with one of your fellow back packers when arriving back at the hostel. Sounds easy enough, right? With logistics and the girl to guy ratio in your favour you can see how the never ending fight for vagina can be rather depressing if you can’t even manage to kiss anyone on three successive nights.

Watching balding, middle aged men having more success with the ladies made me want to pack up my penis and go home, but I felt as though pushing through was my only option.  

On night four I had had a number of unsuccessful approaches and even been physically pushed away from a young group of polish girls so my confidence in approaching had taken a turn for the worst. I had made sure to moderate my alcohol intake because I had noticed over the past few nights I had been incredibly intoxicated and this was not making it any easier for me to maintain an interesting conversation.

With balls full of semen and with what seemed like litres of red bull pumping through my veins I made my way through a sea of horny Spanish men to the smoking area to meet with Lionel. We discussed the general pretentiousness of the clubs in Krakow and decided on trying something slightly more alternative for the following evening if we weren’t successful on this particular night.  

As we made our way back down the stairs and onto the dance-floor I noticed a short Italian girls making her way towards us. Her breasts were perky and her waist thin with hair very similar style to that of 'Sideshow Bob' from The Simpsons. We made eye contact and she flashed me a smile so I blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

Me: “I want to live in your hair!”

Italian: “That would be nice”

Me: “Are you going for a smoke?”

Italian: “Yes”

Me: “Okay, I’m coming with you”

I followed her closely to sneak a peak at what she looked like from behind. Her booty was magnificent. Not big, not small and had similar characteristics to a well-rounded peach. I had been in similar situations before where I’d think too much about the end result so I was careful to keep anything sexually orientated out of my thoughts and became more focused on building attraction and fending off any potential cock-blockers.

As it turned out she was with an Erasmus group and was studying dentistry, which partially explained why her teeth looked fairly well maintained. After two attempts at kissing her she finally caved – “I don’t usually kiss in public”, this was an obvious attempt at making herself feel less slutty, but I was happy to go along with it – “I don’t either, but this just feels so right.” Vomit.

When talking to a girl with English as their second language you find yourself saying things that would make any native English speaker cringe. It seems to work quite well so I’m happy to continue spitting corny drivel to keep my penis happy.

After one too many Spanish men interrupting our conversation I decided it would be a good time to leave. At this point I was getting fairly drunk and became quite concerned that I wouldn’t be able to maintain a full and firm erection if I was to get her back to my hostel. I would later discover that this was only a slight issue.

As we walked up the stairs to my hostel dorm room I could hear what sounded like fifty people partying inside so I quickly grabbed the Italian's hand and pulled her upstairs. Assuming the girl will bang in a toilet is far more effective than trying to talk her into it, which is something I learnt the hard way.

As I bent her over the toilet bowl I noticed my cock was approximately three quarters erect so I decided finger banging her from behind would have me ready to go. As I slid one finger in I noticed it had been caked in a thin layer of blood so I opted for politely asking for a blowjob which was a more sanitary option. The sex would end with me jizzing on her back. 

The Italian: “It’s so warm.” She remarked as if she'd just stepped outside on the first day of summer.

Me: "Yep"

In the morning I felt a great sense of satisfaction that I hadn’t given up the fight for pussy. Although it was only three days my penis’ expectations are high and this is the reason pushing through in any situation will always open more doors and/or legs.

  

- Gavin Madden

Saturday night bender in Wroclaw

Wroclaw is a city, which has a high percentage of students and it was because of this Lionel, Harry and I chose it as our next destination.

As I sit at my computer in the common room of my hostel I am mentally and psychically drained. Trying to seduce Polish girls with limited conversational English has tested both my patience and level of skill in the game of charades.

We had met some girls from Belarus two nights prior and they had recommended a party that, judging by the video on youtube, looked the goods.

I had managed to kiss the one of the Belarusians and had later found out through her facebook page that she had a boyfriend so I decided to ‘friend’ her and see if I couldn’t get her to introduce me to some of her friends.

Within 15 minutes of arriving at the club Harry had gotten close to a young looking polish girl and disappeared. He had mentioned earlier that due to his drought he was willing to bust a nut in anything with a vagina, so I presumed that was exactly what he was doing.

Meanwhile Lionel and I had made friends with a very pale, energetic Polish man who had decided that giving us free cocaine was a good idea. Every 45 minutes he would wave us into the toilet where we would share a cubicle and snort lines off a credit card he had kindly provided us with.

Ten minutes before the club closed I struck up a conversation with the most perfect looking girl in the entire establishment. She was a tall brunette with impeccable teeth and complexion. She had a way about her that made me want to quickly undress her and expose her holes to the midnight air, but doing this may have had me kicked out so I decided it’d be best to maintain a polite conversation. As it turned out she was working so I got her facebook and set my sights on the next venue.

We walked out into the daylight like a pack of talkative zombies. One of the Polish men we had quickly made friends with suggested a club that didn’t close to 11am and at the time it sounded like one of the greatest ideas of all time.

The club was dark and dingy with couches scattered throughout. Making eye contact with people seemed a little strange, but everyone seemed to be having a good time. We danced with a 76-year-old man who spoke no English and watched countless drug fucked men trying their luck at anything that remotely resembled a female.

After chatting with few Polish men for a few hours Lionel and I decided it would be best to leave. As we were saying our goodbyes we noticed two reasonably attractive girls sit down next to us. We would spend the next 3-hours struggling through conversation, but luckily they knew how to agree to letting us “sleep” at their apartment.

Ewalina was tall and skinny and did some modelling work as well as university. Bozena is comparison was wider set with gigantic breasts and a stereotypical Eastern European face. I wasn’t overly interested in Bozena and taking one for the team wasn’t something I am used to, but with the haze of alcohol and drugs clouding my judgement, I decided that she was bangable.

Ewalina had made it very clear that we all had to sleep in the same bed much to the delight of my penis. Our only hope was a fourgy or some type of awkward situation where one pair would try to ignore the fact that the other pair were exchanging litres of body fluid only centimetres away. Needless to say none of these scenarios became a reality.

Over the next 12 hours it became apparent that these girls were hooked on prescription medication and very paranoid about leaving either Lionel or I alone with one of them. After a visit from Bozena’s mother it turned out she was a doctor and also her drug supplier. Her mother was very nice, but judging by her alcohol consumption, she may have had an underlying alcohol problem.

We left the apartment on Monday afternoon with nothing more than a few make out sessions and some dry sex. I can thankfully confirm for you that this was due to their drug consumption because the following night I would bang Bozena with little resistance.

What happened to Lionel and Ewalina you ask? Lionel went back to the apartment and I haven’t heard from him in two days.  Fingers crossed he died from sex exhaustion.

- Gavin Madden

Wearing down a non-slutty Wroclaw sex slave

After one month in Ukraine it was time to set our sights on Wroclaw, Poland’s fourth largest city. Lionel had been in contact with Katrina, a girl he banged a few months beforehand and she had arranged an apartment for us, which was a two-minute walk from the city centre. Good girl.

Upon our arrival it became apparent that although we had an amazing view overlooking the city, we were provided with only one room. Lionel and I decided it would be best to use a wooden cabinet and a plant to divide the room up into two, which would make for a more suitable bedding arrangement if one of us were to drag a girl back to our lair.

Tuesday night was ladies night at a club called ‘Eter club’. The bar was filled horny men and a few attention whores with scores no higher than a 6. I had been flying solo throughout the night because Lionel was busy with Katrina and had managed to kiss a girl from Belarus. I wasn’t completely satisfied with her quality so any follow up date was going to be my second preference.

The following few days I had been contacted by a Polish girl I knew from my time in Belgium in 2010. Gosia was short, blonde and fairly attractive, but had had a boyfriend for as long as I knew her. She was a stripper four times a week and had never been drunk in her life, but always seemed to have a buzz about her when out clubbing.

We arranged to meet up and she made a point of telling me that she had broken up with her boyfriend over a year ago. If you have ever met Gosia you would know that she has a certain glint in her eye when talking to you that says: “I am slightly psychotic and want to sit on your face”, so naturally I was curious to find out how much of a psycho she actually was.

After 2 hours at the bar Gosia and I were isolated from the group and it was then I decided to kiss her. The kissing wouldn’t stop for an hour, but it was going to be tough to convince her to invite me back to her apartment. During our conversation at the bar she had mentioned only having sex with “people that she loved” and that she had only had sex with 5 different guys.

It was the following night that I managed to weasel my way into her car and instructed her to drive to her place. Getting her perfectly shaped breasts out wasn’t a problem and it was at this time she lead me to the shower. With my rock hard boner rubbing against her leg, all I could manage was a hand-job and to blow the contents of my ball sac on her stomach. 

Day three would see me back at her house. Earlier in the day we had been chatting on facebook and she had mentioned that she liked to be treated “like a whore”. Not unlike porn, she wanted to be face-fucked until she couldn’t breathe. This girl was whack, but there was no stopping what my dick ordered and that was sex with Gosia.

Getting her naked was never a problem, but putting my dick in her vagina was as easy as trying to fit my fist up my own ass. She was happy to suck my dick and let me spray cum all over her face, but sex would make her feel “slutty”. Females trying to rationalise sex is quite entertaining, but so very frustrating at the same time. I woke up with her riding my face in the morning so it wasn’t all that bad.

The next day I again spoke with Gosia on facebook. “If you come over tonight I will fuck you”, was the first thing she typed to me. I decided it was in my dick’s best interest to go visit her for once last time. She invited me around for dinner and agreed to pick me up from my apartment at 10pm.

We talked over dinner and it was discovered that the reason she doesn’t drink is because she is on anti-anxiety medication, which was stronger than Xanax. I think it has something to do with the hope for insane sex, but this was a huge turn on.

After dinner we watched a movie, but I was keen to get the party started so I began to undress her. I removed her shirt as she removed her tights and underwear. With her perfectly toned stripper body on centre stage in her living room, I slid my hand up the inside of her thigh and onto her pussy. Much to my surprise she had a tampon nestled inside, which she quickly removed. Having a girl remove her bloody tampon right in front of me wasn’t exactly making me pre-cum, but after four days without sex I ignored how revolting it was.

The moment I entered her pussy it was the like the hand of Goliath was squeezing my cock. It was definitely the tightest pussy I have ever fucked. I felt uncomfortable calling her a whore during sex, but this is what she wanted and seemed to get her off more than dick itself.

Afterwards I walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water when I noticed blood splattered all over my t-shirt.

Me: “Hmmmm"

Gosia: “Take it off, I’ll wash it for you right now.”

Aren't Polish girls the best?

- Gavin Madden