What have I become?

The past 2 weeks have been a complete roller coaster. My final nights in Lagos proved to be incredibly frustrating and things I wanted to get done simply didn't. On my second last night I was drunk and ran into a past fling that I never managed to seal the deal with. She was a blonde Belgian with a tiny frame - maybe 45kgs. I have known her from a trip to Lagos 2 years ago and had always had the strange sexual desire to throw her into a wall and fuck her whilst she was stuck in the wall. 

When we bumped into each other I decided it was tonight she would be my little ragdoll. Unfortunately for me my cries for sex went unanswered and I resorted to telling her it was my last night in Lagos and that she had to spend the rest of the night with me. It was obvious to me that my drug intake had dramatically ruined my game and I became the needy guy that gets nowhere. The final night would pan out much the same; sloppy make out sessions and borderline sex on the dance floor. The night ended with me alone in the kitchen stealing food from my housemate’s fridge and eventually catching my bus out of Lagos at 7am.

My next stop would be Tomorrowland in Belgium. I can honestly say that although my drug intake ruined my chances of scoring pussy, it was the greatest 4 days of my life. The days and nights were loose and any drug under the sun was readily available. We had some random Israeli making deliveries each and every morning and the drugs were reasonably priced. 

Having been starved of sex for close to a week it was becoming very clear to me what the following week would do to my standards. I WOULD FUCK EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING THAT FELL INTO MY LAP. My standards were now out the door and knowing that my dick couldn't tell the different between hot vagina and ugly vagina helped me rationalise trying the fuck absolute mingers. 

It would be in Warsaw that I would come across an absolute slut of a woman. Hearing her fuck some dude in the hostel dorm room in the early hours of the morning provided me with some tentativeness when it came to making any type of move. I'd say she was a 5 at best, of Polish/German descent and tits that would collectively weigh the same as a reasonably sized dog. I spent the night on a pubcrawl with a few friends and I'd keep her at an arms length as a back up plan if I didn't pull at the club. The night would end with anal sex in the hostel bathroom.

- Gavin Madden